Chapter 59
Chapter 59
Liliana
The moment Damian opened the door, Jeremiah told me to visit Eldergroove if I ever decided to accept his offer. I don’t think I should say to him that because I am not actually planning to go, so yeah…
“I don’t know. We couldn’t talk about it”
“What else did you talk about then?” Why is he starting this conversation again?
“I already told you what we talked about yesterday, Damian. Let’s focus on Great Luna instead. If he really is a guy sent by her and also the spy in CrystalMoon, both of these are alarming for us.” I say and he nods, going into deep thought for a
moment.
“I have put my men on this work. They are finding both Jeremiah Watts and the spy”
“I see” The air becomes tense.
He was right. He really wears danger like ornaments on his body. There is always so much happening around him, and yet he remains calm. No, he seems to enjoy it because he thinks of it as a badge of honour.
It’s like an everyday thing for him which is…not acceptable. It’s sad. No one should wake up with a dagger in their hand just because there could be someone by their bedside, ready to kill them.
It’s cruel.
“Since how long have you been enduring assassination attempts?” I ask and fiddle with my fingers, taking some good seconds before I gaze up at him.
He is silent, more than I have ever seen him and he looks like he is remembering something. His body language is relaxed- and yet something about it looks tense.
He looks like he is zoning out but then his eyes squint as if he is dealing with a great deal of messed
up stuff.
“Ever since I was born? I don’t know. I haven’t had a happy childhood. So, can’t remember when was it that I didn’t have a dagger under my pillow as you said”
My heart clenched with sorrow and I couldn’t even let out a sound. I had to bite my lips to hold back. I saw the pain flickering in his eyes for a nanosecond and the way his whole face stopped before morphing into a complete sheet of pain just broke something inside me.
“What kind of childhood did you have?” I find myself asking and he gives me a wry
smile,
“My parents were not exactly on good terms and I grew up watching fights and disagreements. It was always loud” He says causally but the calmness in his tone sends chills down my spine.
“They weren’t mates?” I ask and he nods.
“They were” A twisted smile hangs onto his lips when he speaks.
“They were fated mates. However, my father didn’t give a shit about those things unlike my mother whose expectations and dreams for her lover started with the word ‘mate
My
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father had a lover of his own before he married my mom and instead of her, she wanted to marry his lover which
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couldn’t happen because of my grandparents.
They couldn’t let the heir of the BloodClaw pack fool around with somebody else when he already had a mate. They met at the old boring summer solstice ball and everyone knew they were mates and my grandparents thought that was the perfect time to take action.
They proceeded with the marriage without changing my father’s mind.” He sips, taking a short pause and I listen with a bated breath.
Damian is sharing a part of himself and I am fretting because it is an important conversation which is breaking my heart as I imagine how hard it must have been for him.
I want to pull him into a hug but would that be arrogant of me? Thinking a hug can heal the wounds burned into him? Which goes deeper into his soul from the flesh.
“The one–year as my mom told me was terrible for her. She wasn’t able to comprehend why he was treating her that way. She tried her best to impress my father and make him love her but all in vain when one fateful night they had me.
The next year into their marriage, I was born. She said I brought tons of happiness along with me and her marriage improved but then she found out the reason behind my father’s cold treatment towards her in the first year of their marriage.
One family evening, the special days when father was supposed to spend time with us at any cost no matter how important work he had or not, Mom felt a sharp pain in her stomach.
The pain was something she hadn’t experienced before. It was different from everything and then suddenly she realized it was the pain of disrespecting the mate bond.” I wince when I hear about what his mom had to go through.
I can relate to and understand everything very well because I have been in the same situation. I can’t believe Damian’s father cheated on her after having a pup with her! That’s crossing all limits of cruelty!
“Was he…was he cheating on her?” My voice is trembling when I ask him and he nods.
He fills up another glass of wine and continues, “He was kissing his lover when mom got to his office to see him and from then on, the hell of their marriage started. Mom got to know everything.
Father was seeing his lover even after the marriage. It was a tough time for Mom because she had so much to endure alone. I grew up watching her worry and grow sick every day when one day things finally got better.
My father stopped seeing his lover and cut all communications with her because his lover found her real mate and dumped my father first but my mom was gracious enough to forgive everything and start over.”
He says with a mocking smile and then his eyes widen a little with sarcasm. “It actually worked and they became a loving couple which was unbelievable at many times and maybe I shouldn’t have doubted it too much.”
“What…do you mean?”
“My mom died a week later after my father declared me as his next heir and started my training.”
Oh my god! I cover my mouth in horror and tears threaten to fall. My shoulders shake and I remember my own mother who left me. Till now, I have always believed that my sister and I shared the same mother but that’s not the case.
I remember sister Iris telling me that Mom loved to play with me when I was a baby. I don’t even remember her face because she died so early and now…I have come to know that she wasn’t even my real mother.
I have no clue who my real mother is except that she is a witch. All my life, I have longed for my dead mother and now I am
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Chapter 59
stolen of that privilege too.
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I don’t know anything about my real mother, whether she is alive or dead and the one I had believed was my mother turned out to be my stepmother.
I longed for a mom all my life and now I have realized that I am truly blessed with very bad luck because there is no mom in my fate. However, I always yearned for the affection I didn’t receive, the motherly warmth but Damian.
He is different, he received it and then lost it. It is ten times more terrible than what I am going through. I lace my fingers with his and place a soft kiss on the back of his hand.
“I am sorry for your loss, Damian. It’s something I am able to comprehend but the saddest thing is that I know, I won’t be able to ease the pain you suffered all alone.” At least for now. “I wish to take the grief which stays with you. I truly do” I say and feel his hand tightening around mine.
Even if I won’t be able to heal the wounds on his soul now, I still wish to heal those on his flesh. He doesn’t say anything nor does his face show any emotion but his hold around my hand feels desperate as if he is holding it with all his might.
“I don’t have a mom” I chuckle when I go through those words and they sound a little inappropriate. The sudden laugh comes out sad and self–mocking. “It sounds a little inappropriate if I word it this way, right? Well, I have and had a mom.”
I look up to see his face and he is sitting there silently, listening to me with a serious look on his face. I continue talking after watching his quiet motivation.
“My mom passed away when I had just learnt to speak. I was sad but the worst about it all was I didn’t even remember her face. It filled me with an entirely different sense of longing and yearning for her existence.
I heavily leaned on my older sister Iris and my father.” I grew bitter when I mentioned father. I don’t know what to call him now. It’s ambiguous and bitter.
He has disowned me, making me doubt all those years I grew up in his care and affection. It is as if I am stuck in the loop of bad luck where everything which beautified and fulfilled my life got stolen away but then I met Damian.
Who broke that loop and changed everything for me.
“My sister often used to tell me that my mother loved playing with me. She was happy to have me.” My voice shakes and I take a pause. I don’t know why I feel like crying all of a sudden. My lips won’t stop quivering.
I am trying to contain my emotions when suddenly Damian pulls me onto him and wraps his arm around
my
waist.
“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. It’s okay” He whispers and his voice cocoons me into his warmth. I feel everything inside me condense and I bring my eyes to his face.
I soak his beautiful features and watch his grey pearls which soothe my heart. I turn my face to my right, adjust myself and settle comfortably between his legs.
My legs are perched on his thigh, our intertwined hands are on top of my legs and I am snuggled into his chest with his arm around my waist.
