Chapter 45
Everly POV
I wasn’t expecting the answer I received from the doctor; I wasn’t even aware the bond could be damaged, Sure I was used to the pain, but to know he hurt our bond? Nothing felt lessened to me. I still felt for Valen despite not wanting to, still craved him despite hating everything about him. I just wanted to go home and snuggle my son, smell his scent, and let him soothe my racing mind.
Yet the way Valen looked at me, I could see his fear clearly etched onto his face. Could see how much the doctor’s words scared him as he pressed his face into my neck. Valen finally understood the weight of actions, and I could tell the burden was heavy for him to carry. His grip on my arms was tight like he thought I was about to drop dead before his eyes. My heart twisted painfully in my chest with the way his voice cracked as he spoke.
“You want me to beg? I will fucking beg,” Valen tells me before dropping on his knees. He clutches my legs, and if the wall wasn’t behind me, I would have toppled over. I can feel his warm breath caress over the skin under my blouse where it had ridden up. I feel the shake of his shoulders and know he is falling apart. I know I shouldn’t feel bad for him after everything he had done, and maybe it was the bond, but the way spoke told me he knew the pain of losing a mother even if he didn’t know her. I wondered what sort of man he would be if she raised him. Would he be the mate I needed him to
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Chapter 45
be, the father he needed to be for our son?
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Most of all, I wondered If I could ever forgive him, even if it was only for Valarian.
“Please, if not for yourself. Do it for Valarian, don’t leave him because of me, don’t do that to our son,” he chokes out, and before I could stop myself, I ran my fingers through his hair wanting to soothe the agony I could hear bleeding into his
voice.
“For Valarian,” I whisper, the words not sounding my own as I think of my son. The person in this world that held all my broken pieces together, the child I carried to term, the child I raised and loved. The one person who loved me back.
“Please,” Valen begs, and I glance down at him to see him staring up at me. I tear my gaze away. I promised myself I could do it on my own, and I felt like doing this meant I was giving in, tossing everything I worked hard for away. But I wouldn’t toss my life away. I could not bear the thought of Valarian being in this world alone without me.
“Everly?” Valen whispers, and I look down at the man on his knees, hanging onto me like he could somehow put me back together if he squeezed hard enough. I watched his eyes brim with tears, and my hand moved from his hair to cup his face on instinct. His stubble is rough against my palm, and I brush a stray tear as he blinks and it careens over.
“I’ll do anything, but don’t make him grow up without a mom,”
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Chapter 45
Valen whispers, and his lip quivers as he leans into my hand before kissing my palm, sparks dancing across it. I bite my lip and look away from the broken man before me.
“I mark you, that doesn’t mean you own me, and you don’t force my hand,” I say.
“I promise,” he says, pulling away and I snort, my own tears spilling when I look back down, and he is holding out his pinky.
“I’ll even pinky promise.”
“You know you can’t break one of those. They are sacred,” I chuckle. He nods before standing, and I look up at him.
“You won’t use your Alpha voice on me. You won’t mark me unless I let you,” I ask him, but he shakes his head.
“I won’t promise not to mark you, I won’t watch you wither away because you are too stubborn, I won’t let you get to that point Everly, so don’t ask me to promise you that, ask for anything else but that.”
“But if I mark you, you can just turn around and do the same,”
I tell him.
“I won’t. I can promise you not today, though?” he asks, and I sigh. He holds his pinky up and wiggles it, and I roll my eyes.
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Chapter 45
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“I promise to make it up to you; I promise to not use my Alpha voice on you anymore if you promise to mark me before we leave this apartment,” I chew my lip while considering what to do, but he is right, I would be killing myself out of
stubbornness if I refuse. And if I refuse, he will probably mark me anyway and take his chances.
“Everly?” Valen says, pressing closer, so his chest pressed against mine. He held his pinky up, and I felt my lips try to tug in the corners over the silly little thing I had with Valarian.
“Okay,” I tell him, gripping it with mine. Valen lets out a breath and dips his face toward mine and I press further into the wall I am caged against. His nose skims across my cheek to my ear. My heart thumps erratically in my chest at what I agreed to.
“Thank you,” he whispers next to my ear. His scent overwhelms my senses, and I lean into him, soaking up his scent and inhaling deeply. When I feel his hand slip into my hair. A shiver runs up my spine, and he turns his head, offering me his neck.
“Please, Everly, just claim me. It can mean whatever you want it to mean. Just do it,” he murmurs, and I suck in a deep, shaky breath. I could do this, right, but at the same time, I hated giving him the wrong idea. Yet my mouth starts watering at his intoxicating scent, overwhelming the part of me that was denying him, and I feel my canines slip from my gums before sinking them into his neck.
Valen grips my hair and presses so close I can feel every hard
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Chapter 45
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line of muscle that remained hidden beneath his shirt. My teeth sink in deeply, and warmth blooms in my chest before I feel the tether binding him to me snap in place. Valen
shudders against me, and his emotions slam into me like he just slapped me.
Guilt, overwhelming guilt so strong I nearly choke on it. Yet also immense relief that I marked him. I am not sure what to think as my teeth pull from his skin, and I run my tongue across the mark, sealing it. Valen doesn’t let me go. Instead, he leans against me pressing his weight into me;; when he turns his face toward mine, leaning down and pressing his forehead against mine.
“Now you own me,” he whispers before glancing at my blood- smeared lips. He moves his hand, cupping my face before brushing his thumb across my lip and wiping his blood off. “Now you have my heart, and it’s your choice whether or not you break it.”
“But please don’t,” he murmurs, and I move my hand to the center of his chest. I can feel his heart thumping beneath it rapidly like a hummingbird’s wings fighting against stormy winds, and he sucks in a deep breath at my touch.
“Don’t make me have to,” I tell him before looking away. Valen nods, dropping his head on my shoulder and inhaling my scent as he presses his face into the crook of my neck. I have to fight the reaction my body had when his breath sweeps over where his mark should be laid. Every part of me urges me toward him and made me want to curl up on his lap and let him hug away the five years of pain, let him fill the void that
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was caused by him. However, I knew that was the bond speaking and that his emotions were bleeding into me as if they were my own.
“We should get back to Valarian,” I tell him, and he nods before stepping back.
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