Chapter 133
Chapter 133
Fiona POV
“Wake up Fiona Regan’s voice is quiet and soft and her hand is gentle as she shakes me awake.
I blink the sleep from my eyes and stare up at her for a moment, confused, until I realize why she’s here, silently getting up from my bed and grabbing my robe, walking out of my room without a word. Of course. It’s time. I walk outside, Xander and Xavier standing patiently underneath the moonlight, Celeste standing next to them.
“You should change, you don’t have much time” Xander’s voice is soft as he tries to give me a reassuring smile.
My father turns his back as do the others while I begin to strip off my clothing before adopting the robe I’ve brought with me. When I shift, all my clothes that I’m wearing at the time will be ruined, hence the robe.
I clear my throat. “You can turn back around now,” I say quietly.
I feel nervous. Although I’ve told myself I don’t need these people, that I want nothing to do with them, a small part of me is glad they have taken the time to be with me. I’m afraid of the pain, having been told by numerous pack members how excruciating the first shift it. It’s the most painful of all, even with your family members or if you are lucky enough to have found them, your mate present. I have no such luck.
“It’s okay to be nervous. I remember how painful my first shift was” Xander speaks, his voice soft in the stillness of the night.
“I’m not nervous” I lied, while Celeste merely gave me a knowing look.
She’s dressed in a long flowing white dress, her hair cascading loosely down her shoulders, her face au natural. She looks envious as she gazes at me. I know that she’s jealous, that she wishes it was her going through the transformation first. It must be killing her to know that she has to wait a few more weeks until she can do the same as me. I feel my body trembling and wrap my arms around myself, feeling the coldness of the air as I slowly breathe in and out.
“You’ll be fine” Regan speaks, standing beside her two mates.
“I know I will. Don’t worry, I don’t expect much from you” I told them all bluntly.
My father exhales. “Look, I know you don’t but this is an important moment for you and we want to make you comfortable. When you shift” he pauses and looks at me, raising a brow “I’m going to put a hand on you, try and take as much of the pain. as I can from you, so that you can concentrate on the shifting part.”
“I would do the same” Regan began to say and I couldn’t hold back.
“Except you aren’t my real mother,” I said nastily.
Instant silence. Regan glances uncomfortably at her mates, her face drooping slightly. Part of me feels guilty for saying such a thing, but another part of me simply thinks I have done nothing but state the brutal truth.
“You don’t have to be such a bitch Fiona Celeste speaks out, fixing her eyes on me “we get that you hate us but you have to treat us like garbage.”
don’t
I open my mouth to protest but Regan speaks up. “Enough. Celeste, please” she reaches out and takes hold of her daughter’s hand as I look away, feeling jealous “I know you’re trying to help but I don’t need you to play hero for me. I can speak for myself,” she tells Celeste while Celeste shoots me a look filled with daggers.
“I just think she could be a lot nicer” Celeste grumbled.
*Shut up” I snarled, turning to her “either be quiet or leave. I don’t have to put up with you being here and I sure as hell am not in the mood to be lectured to. It was your idea to be here, not mine” I added as Celeste stared at me “and I can do this perfectly fine on my own, thank you very much.”
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Chapter 133
Regan bit her lip. “Please, no more Celeste” she whispered to my half–sister as she gave a dramatic sigh “I really want to be here for Fiona. I’m going to be there for you too” she promised.
Of course. Nothing would drag Regan away from being with her precious daughter. It still rankled that the only reason she had asked to be here was so that Celeste could witness the transformation for herself and prepare for her own shift in a few weeks time. No amount of telling me she wanted to be here for my sake was going to persuade me otherwise. Everything was always about Celeste. I sighed and shook my head, glancing upwards at the sky and watching the slow movement of the moon. It couldn’t be too much longer surely? Any minute now, I would start to feel the burning pain as I turned eighteen and my bones began to break. I could feel the sweat beginning to bead on my forehead in anticipation. I swallowed hard. I saw Regan shoot her mates a concerned look but dismissed it.
“Any minute now” I murmured, bouncing up and down on my feet, swinging my arms back and forth like Mike Tyson.
What was taking so long? I mean, judging by the moon and the brightness, not to mention the time I had left the room, surely it was almost midnight? I glanced at my father, Xander questioningly, seeing that he had a look on his face. It didn’t bode well.
“What’s the time?” I asked slowly.
Surely not? I had suffered enough already without the added humiliation of this. I could see Celeste smirking though and my stomach began to feel as though there was a lead weight inside of it. It was impossible. It was almost unheard of for this to happen. It was rare, it did happen; but no, god, please, not to me. I could feel my eyes beginning to water as I silently begged my father to tell me otherwise.
“It’s one–minute past midnight.”
My body deflated. One minute past midnight. The shift should have already started by now. My body should be heating up, my bones should be breaking. Instead, nothing was happening. I stared at my father as he looked down at the floor, apparently not knowing what to say.
“But” I whispered as Celeste began to titter in the background and Regan began to give me a sympathetic look, “shouldn’t I be shifting by now?” I asked helplessly.
“Give it a few more minutes,” Regan said, even though she looked concerned “maybe we have our timing wrong. Or maybe your wolf is just late?” she tried to joke but no smile appeared on my face.
Without a wolf, I was useless to a pack. I couldn’t do anything, not even go for patrol. I felt myself beginning to shake all over. My teeth chattered. My father tried to put a hand on my shoulder, but I moved away. Minutes passed, unbearably slowly. Still nothing. The longer time passed, the more woebegone my father and his mates began to look. Instinctively I knew this was it. I wasn’t going to get my wolf. It was too late. I was practically a human. I wiped tears from my eyes.
“Fiona, it’s not the end of the world” my father tried to tell me.
“Isn’t it?” I turned on him, my voice rising “we both know how useless a person is without their wolf. I might be stronger than the average human, I might heal slightly faster, but I will still be practically human” I almost yelled in my frustration. “Nothing goes right for me. Nothing” I sobbed “it’s almost like I’m cursed because of my mother and what she did. How much more do I have to pay for her mistakes?” I wept as Regan stood there stricken and Xavier stared at me, a look of regret on his face. “I didn’t do anything to hurt you, or anyone else but I’m being punished for it anyway. I know this makes you happy Celeste” I turned on her as she tried to wipe the smile off her face, but it was far too late as I had already seen it. “I hope your transformation goes better than mine, but I have no doubt that it will” I said bitterly. “Nothing bad ever happens to you, does it Celeste” I added darkly, bending down and grabbing my clothes, feeling utterly defeated.
“Fiona, wait” Xander interjected.
“Leave me alone” I whispered brokenly, turning my back on them. “You insisted on being her and where has it gotten m Wolfless, weak and more pathetic than ever. Just leave me alone” I whispered, feeling them all still behind me “and let m move on from this pack. God knows if the Black Lightning Pack will still take me now” I added resentfully “because I can hardly be an asset to them now can I?”
I moved off, practically running back to the pack house before anybody could answer. I already knew the answer to the
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Chapter 133
question. Tears streamed down my face as I shut the door to my bedroom and locked it, s?
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